Happy to be child free.
I’m not going to have any children. It’s a decision my wife and I made, and I’m happy about it. I think the most compelling reason to have a child is because you actually want to have a child. I also think that if you can’t honestly say that you want to have a child, you really should think long and hard before conceiving. I never once thought to myself, “Yes, I want to have a child.” Not once. At best, I thought “Maybe. Some day. Some unspecified day way off in the future.” And those moments were not frequent. So I’m comfortable with my choice and happy about it.
That being said, very occasionally, I have a small twinge of remorse. Not for me — I’m responsible enough to realize that I’m not responsible enough to raise a child. I couldn’t handle a dog, there’s no way I could handle a child (and I tend to like animals a lot more than most people). So, no, not for me do I feel remorse, but for society as a whole.
And, no I don’t feel remorse because I’m depriving the world from the obvious glory that would be my spawn. Hell, no. But I do worry that, by and large, those that don’t seriously consider the implications and importance of being a parent are the ones who are most often becoming parents. The people who I know personally who have had children have thought it out, and that makes me happy. But I know they’re in the minority.
I dunno, I’m just ranting again. This article is what made me think of this. But then, I guess if I don’t have any vested stake in the future of society by way of offspring, perhaps I should just chill and enjoy things.
Yeah, that’s what I’ll do.
“Many people, I fear, believe they are powerless to make a change in the world. They accept things as they are, more or less. They complain, but they don’t work for change.”
So very true.
I think I resent the implication of this comment. Are you suggesting I go and have kids? Because, wow, is that not the answer.
But you bring this up in other contexts, too, which makes me think that you think I complain a lot without actually doing anything.
Yes, there are things I complain about and I don’t actually do anything about it. Typically, though not always, it is because I’m not sure what I can do, and the complaint is just a cathartic exercise. But there are things I complain about and I do something about it.
I complain about the lousy government we have. What do I do about it? I donate money to causes I believe in, including candidates I support. At election day, though I was unable to vote due to not being a citizen, I encouraged everyone I knew to get out and vote. And now, as a citizen, I’ll be voting every opportunity I get.
I complain about abusing our environment. Such as big, gas-guzzling SUVs and the people who drive them. What do I do? Every car our family has owned since 2000 gets 45mpg or better. I have converted almost the entire house to using either LED or CFL bulbs.
But to hold to the argument that you’re not allowed to complain about something unless you also take some sort of physical action is shortsighted and wrong. Sometimes, all one can do is complain. Sometimes, one person’s complaint can stir another person to action.
But, yeah, sometimes I and others will complain about something but not actually *do* anything about it. And sometimes that’s because we can’t.
I didn’t get the whole “hate all children” impression from the posted article, so I definitely didn’t mean to imply that any specific person should or shouldn’t produce kids.
On the other hand, I did get the “go out and do something” impression from the article, and thus I pasted the line that I found to be most important. People who know me well know that I’m not one to sit and let something I don’t approve of happen without standing up against it, and I like to encourage other people to do the same. Thus, that line. I didn’t mean for it to be accusatory, or at least not any more accusatory than your original posting.
I could easily go on and on about all of the trouble I’ve gotten into for standing up for or against things I liked or didn’t like…
Growing up, it was a given that I would have kids. After having our dog, and all the responsibilities of having a dog - I am not so sure anymore. I like having our dog, but I also love the time away to do things without worrying about her. When I make plans, I think will the dog be okay x number of hours inside? With kids, I can’t be selfish. One day when I am really WANT a kid is when I’ll reconsider having kids.
I’m with ya, kit. I was the same way, and the dog was a real eye opener. I just assumed I’d have kids someday, but it never kicked in for real. I think in my case things turned out for the best — I have a life I’m happy with, and there’s one less person on this planet who’s got parents who resent him/her.
And, Cory, thanks for the post — I had a hair-trigger reaction and I think I went over the top.
I don’t even know why I really posted this to begin with. Like I said, among my friends with kids, I don’t think any of them took that decision lightly and they all seem genuinely happy. And they’re good, intelligent people who are going to raise good, intelligent people.
So, yay!
Apropo funny!
http://www.wondermark.com/d/277.html